Lump (Presidents of the United States of America)

Last Friday, when I went to bed, I noticed a marble sized lump on my inner thigh. Of course, I poked & prodded at it all night long to make sure it was really there or if it had gone away yet. And, of course it hadn't. Instead, I think I made it bigger or at least more tender & gave it a bruise. My first thought? I have leg cancer. My second thought? Who gets leg cancer?

When it didn't go away on Monday, I made an appointment with good ol' UW Physicians. My doctor poked at it some, asked if it hurt (yes, but not unbearably so) & then diagnosed it as a "not uncommon" infected sweat gland. Doesn't that sound pleasant? She wrote a prescription for some antibiotics & told me to take a hot bath (as hot as I can stand) several times a day or put a heating pad on it & come back on Wednesday to drain it. I like baths, but that wasn't going to work for me. I took one that night & the next day after work, bought a heating pad.

Wednesday, I went in to get the sucker drained. Two doctors looked at it this time (one was consulting the other to see if it was liquified enough to be drained). They decided to give it a go. The most painful part of the day was getting the local anesthetic. That needle hurt!! But, once it was numb, I didn't feel the scalpel cutting my skin. Didn't feel the doc squeezing the pus out of it (by the way, the pus looked like mom's secret sauce - you know, ketchup & mayo mixed together). Didn't feel her inserting the gauze into the hole (yes, INTO the hole). She sent me home with some gauze, tape & a medical glove to put it in. After my fun appointment (which lasted close to an hour), I went into work & only then, after walking for a short ways, did it start to hurt. The doc had offered some drugs (vicadin) for the pain, but I didn't think I needed it. And, I survived without it thus far.

So, here I am with what looks to be a candle's wick poking out of my leg. It hurts some, but it's not totally excruciating. I think I'll survive.

Saturday, I go in to get my wick either replaced or removed. I'm not sure which. Either way, I'm honestly NOT looking forward to it. Thinking about the wick makes me nauseaus. Literally.

Today, I am thankful for:

1. Doctors able to see me 'last minute'

2. Aleve

3. Bruno's

4. American Idol

5. Food Network